There are moments while reading the Synthesis of Yoga when I feel so clearly why he put this particular word in that particular place, and why it could not have been otherwise - that's what makes the translation difficult. For the placement of words is not the same in English and in French. In English, for example, the place an adverb occupies is of major importance for the precise meaning. In French also, but generally it's not the same! If at least it were exactly the opposite of English it would be easier, but it's not exactly the opposite. It's the same thing for the word order in a series of modifiers or any string of words; usually in English, for example, the most important word comes first and the least important last. In French, it's usually the opposite - but it doesn't always work! The spirit of the two languages is not the same. Something always escapes. This must surely be why' revelations' (as Sri Aurobindo calls them) sometimes come to me in one language and sometimes in the other. And it does not depend on the state of consciousness I'm in, it depends on what has to be said. page 429 , Mother's Agenda , volume 1 , 8th Oct. 1960 .

I'm just now finishing the Yoga of Self-Perfection ... When we see what human life is and, even in the best of cases, what it represents in the way of imbecility, stupidity, narrowness, mean ness (not to mention ignorance because that is too flagrant) ... and even those who believe themselves to have generous heart, for example, or liberal ideas, a desire to do good! ... Each time the consciousness orients itself in one direction to attain some result, everything that was in existence (not just one's personal existence, but this sort of collectivity of existences that each being represents), everything that is contrary to this effort immediately presents itself in its crudest light. It happened this morning while I was walking back and forth in my room. I had finished my japa ... I had to stop and hold my head in my hands to keep from bursting into tears. 'No, it is too dreadful,' I said to myself; 'and to think that we want Perfection!' Then naturally there came as a consolation: only because the consciousness is getting closer to THE REAL THING can it see all this wretchedness, and the contrast alone makes these things appear so mean. And it's true, those things I saw this morning which seemed so ... above all stupid and ugly (I've never had a sense of morality at any time in my life, thank God! But stupid and ugly things have always seemed ... I've always done my best to distance myself from them, even when I was very small). And now I see that these things which seem not only ridiculous but, well, almost shameful were considered, as I recall, remarkably noble earlier on and they represented an exceptionally lofty attitude in life - the very same things. So then I understood that it's quite simply a question of proportion. And that's how the world is - things which now seem totally unacceptable to us, things we CANNOT tolerate, were quite all right in the past. The day before yesterday, I spent the whole night looking on. I had read the passage by Sri Aurobindo in The Synthesis on 'supramental time' (wherein past, present and future coexist in a global consciousness). While you're in it, it's marvelous! You understand things perfectly. But when you're not in it ... Above all, there's this problem of how to keep the force of one's aspiration, the power of progress, this power which seems so inevitable - so inevitable if existence (let's simply take terrestrial existence) is to mean anything and its presence to be justified. (This ascending movement towards a progressive 'better' that will be eternally better) - How is this to be kept when you have the total vision ... this vision in which everything coexists. At that moment, the other becomes something like a game, an amusement, if you will. (Not everyone finds it amusing!) And when you contain all that, why allow yourself the pleasure of succession? ... Is this pleasure of succession, of seeing things one after the other, equal to this intensity of the will for progress? ... Words are foolish! The effort to see and to understand this gripped me all night. And when I woke up this morning, I thanked the Lord; I said to Him, 'Obviously, if You were to keep me totally in that consciousness, I could no longer ... I could no longer do my work!' How could I do my work? For I can only say something to people when I feel it or see it, when I see that it's what must be said, but if I am simultaneously in a consciousness in which I'm aware of everything that has led to that situation, everything that is going to happen, everything I'm going to say, everything the other's going to feel - then how could I do it! There are still many hundreds of years to go before it becomes entirely what Sri Aurobindo describes - there's no hurry! page 430-32 , Mother's Agenda , volume 1 , 11th Oct. 1960 .

I am just finishing The Synthesis of Yoga, and what Sri Aurobindo says is exactly what has happened to me throughout my life. And he explains how you can still make mistakes as long as you are not supramentalized. Sri Aurobindo describes all the ways by which images are sent to you - and they are not always images or reflections of the truth of things past, present or future; there are also all the images that come from human mental formations and all the various things that want to be considered. It is very, very interesting. And interestingly enough, in these few pages I have found a description of the work I have spent my whole life doing, trying to SIFT out all we see. I can only be sure of something once a certain type of picture comes, and then the whole world could tell me, 'But things didn't happen like that'; I would reply, 'Sorry, but I see it.' And that type of picture is certain, for I have studied it, I have studied their differences in quality and the texture of the pictures. It is very interesting. page 436 , Mother's Agenda , volume 1 , 11th Oct. 1960 .

And I am ... how to put it? Nothing we say is ever absolutely true, but, to stretch it a bit, while I am ... not worried, not perturbed, not discouraged, I feel I can't get anything done; I spend all my time, all my time, seeing people, receiving and answering letters - doing nothing. I haven't touched my translation [[Mother generally worked a little every day on the French translation of The Synthesis of Yoga. ]] for over a week. page 17 , Mother's Agenda , volume 2 , 7th Jan. 1961